Friday, November 24, 2017

My Little One's First Diwali!

This post is coming up late on the blog because I am surprised I missed it in my gratitude post. It's true that I learnt to let go of anger in that post and as a blogger friend said, I felt so much better getting it off my head. And this is a celebration post! It had stayed in the drafts for a longer time and finally found it's light and got published. My new mother quote is, "Better late than never", yes, with writing and a few other things that really matter as of now.

Anyway, I was thinking if I must name it as "My First Diwali as a Mother", but then I didn't get the time to actually dress up too. What seemed important to me was to dress comfortably for travel and feeding. Do you think that's why I must name it so? 


Well, this Diwali was on my little one. So this is for her. She was gifted cute pattu paavadais by friends and family. Trust me, I haven't personally picked even one dress for her in the last 6 months. In a way, I am thankful that she has a nice wardrobe already. I just find it difficult enough to choose from her collection. Imagine going to a shop and choosing one for her in less than an hour. I choose quick for me, but when it's a gift I take my time. So its the same when I shop for her. My first shopping exclusive for her is yet to happen.

We celebrated Diwali at my mother-in-law's place and it was a grand time. We were all worked up and time flew by so quick with morning food and prayer preparation activities. Usually on the day of Diwali, we prepare some non-vegetarian foods and tiffin items throughout the day, apart from loads of sweets, of course. Jamuns are our all-time favorite, but basundhi came in as a new-try this year. All credits to my co-sister and sister-in-law. After four hours of strenuous stirring, it was all set to be served. Right now, I hold the post of the assistant/helper in the family when it comes to cooking. Once in a while it bothers me that I am not the main-cook, however, when the little one cries while I cut the veggies, I feel thankful about it actually.

All time favorite

My husband was on a no-sweet diet and I loved this opportunity to have more sweets than usual. I don't usually eat sweets, but somehow with a companion like him, we are known to eat more sweets than anybody at home. I arranged all the sweets before him when we sat down for lunch. My plan was to have only sweets for lunch and woo him to have them too. That's when we decided to give Ilakkiya her first sweet treat. The Jamun Jeera. Her eyes were wide and she licked the spoon eagerly. The same evening, I gave her basundhi to taste, just the milk. That's how her first Diwali started off with sweets! I had sweets and more sweets and just one dosa. I always eat 3/4th and never a full tummy. So that was my lunch. Okay, here's the secret, hubby finished the remaining sweets and even told in a cute complaining tone that he did it because of me. He knows very well what sweets mean to him! What's Diwali without sweets, I say!

What I did not like about the whole Diwali week were the fire-crackers. I used to burst during my school days, since those were the times all cousins got together and spent time followed by the nombu (fasting for Kedara Gowri followed by prayers). We never fast, all we did was eat adirasams and suyams after prayers and play again.
After our pet(Joy) came home, my sister and I decided not to burst because we saw him scared. We felt bad for causing so much noise which hurts their alert ears. We also saw many other street dogs finding places to hide due to noise. We have already increased the pollution levels, so now, even when less fire-crackers are being burst, the smoke is very high. Even though we had our doors closed, the hall was filled with smoke. I had to keep Ilakkiya almost covered and inside our bedroom the whole evening. I was worried about people with respiratory issues which I wasn't aware of as young kid.
Hubby, Ilakkiya and I went to my Amma's place for the nombu. After a nice lunch, Amma, Ammama and I started making adirasams. We had a gala time chit-chatting and making these festive goodies. I enjoyed my three day stay and nowadays my stays are now more based on Ilakkiya getting to know her maternal family better. I am glad she doesn't cry with the change here and there. She was scared of the sound of the firecrackers every now and then, but luckily at Amma's place we don't hear it much. So she was free from the noise.

That's how her Diwali was spent. Sweetie pie's first Diwali was noisy, tasty and breezy!

Linking for Vasantha's Linky Party 27

Simple Indian Mom

Image Courtesy: Google

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

Chucky Returns! #Fiction55

Even after 20 years, 
dolls remind Rita of “Chucky”. 
She remembered throwing all her dolls after the movie when she was 10. 
Now, she had “No dolls” rule for her newborn. 
She dropped the parcel and 
ran to her little one’s room when she read,

“I will be your little one's friend till the end!” 

Monday, November 06, 2017

How Gratitude has Changed the Anger in Me This October #GratitudeCircleBloghop

October was a month full of lessons worth this whole year. I am glad to finally write the Gratitude Circle post hosted by Vidya Sury. Last month was a heavy dosage of a lot of things. Fever tops the list. Do read on to know more about the other things that happened and how I let go of anger!

The first week of October brought my first change for the season. I moved back to my mother-in-law's place. The comforting 5-month period at Amma's place is over. Even though I was a bit moody, it was gratitude that made me see it's positive side. It wasn't mere 3-months, but 5-months.  Thankful because by the time I shifted here, my little one slept through most of the night. 

How Comparison Can Let Frustrations Build Quickly:

The first two weeks at home was totally hectic. I wasn't able to do much except chores followed by chores. I thought how relaxed I had been at Amma's place. Right after month 3, Amma made sure I handled Ilakkiya's and my tasks. She made sure I started with the little ones like boiling water for myself and folding Ilakkiya's clothes. At Amma's place, I had Ammama (maternal grandmother), Appa and sister, doing the tasks for me. I had so much time, I used to read and write and at times when the little one sleeps, we used to even sit down and watch a full movie together.

At mother-in-law's place, there were more chores to handle. I was fully occupied only with Ilakkiya's and mine. For a start, I wasn't really able to focus on cooking schedules. Forget the rest of home management. I complained so much this whole month. There were arguments and long silences. I felt annoyed most of the time, even though my family never expected much from me. I guess that was more frustrating for me. I felt incapable. Instead of accepting what I could do and let it be, I complained about what I couldn't and blamed others for causing my frustration. With my little one around, I had set too many rules in the house which very clearly stated I didn't trust anyone. 

The Fever Week!

The first person down with fever was my father-in-law. He was difficult to handle,but we were able to keep things going. Next, my mother-in-law was down. She became so weak that she couldn't even get up from her bed. To see an active woman in a state like this made my heart bleed. For a moment, everything went blank to me. I had a crying baby on one side and a very sick mother-in-law on the other. I thankfully managed my baby easily, but don't we all know strong women are very stubborn too? Yes, it took time for me to convince her to do a few things. I made up my mind to keep a check on the kitchen as well in the coming week. Next day morning I woke up with a 101.7° and my little one had over 100°. With hubby's help we were recovering very slowly. I was lucky to have my sister-in-law and co-sister pitch in and help us. After just over 3-days my husband was down with fever. Thankfully I was able to get up and help in some way.

Did I Have A Meltdown that Changed My Anger?

I had spent so much time on bed that I had questioned myself about my frustrations. My husband was kind enough to sit and listen to my whole 2-hour talk about my fears and my insecurities of being a new mother. I told what worried me a lot and why it did. Somewhere in between, I also conveyed my sorry for aggravating him all three weeks. It was not easy for me. It was easy to accept my mistakes, but it wasn't easy to let go of all that happened and my anger lingered for some more time. Throughout the conversation not even once he took the chance to blame me in all those weeks of frustration. He just told he understands what it is like in a joint family with a new born. That was enough to forgive and forget things that happened. I learnt my best lesson during fever and from the conversations initiated by my husband. 

I am thankful for my mother-in-law who was kind enough and let me be. She took care of the cooking this whole month until we all were down with fever back to back. Thankful for my sister-in-law and co-sister for being kind enough to help us the next three days. 

Every family has its share of troubles. What's important is what we take to the next level? Most times it's that one good deed at the most unexpected time that can change your opinion about a person. Be thankful for every moment. 

Lessons Learned:

  1. Never ever try to change anyone! 
  2. Comparison can be deadly. It can ruin the present happiness and build a frustrated mind before you know it.
  3. Accept what could be done and also accept what cannot be done at this moment.
It is not that I didn't know these lessons, but when we forget, incidents happen to remind us!

All along, I had writing to help me move forward. I took up the Write Tribe October Pro-blogger challenge and wrote bravely for all the prompts. A 9 post challenge which I enjoyed thoroughly with my sub-tribe. Thankful to Corinne and all my friends in the tribe. They had been very supportive during my fever and throughout the blogging challenge.

Last month, I missed sharing gratitude pie. Though I had written thankful moments in my diary, I missed the colorful gratitude pie I used to share with Upasna. November will see me working with colors again. 

Planned a nice evening dinner for Hubby's birthday, but eventually that was the day my mother-in-law got her fever. We just had a good chat and actually that felt better. 

A post shared by Jayanthy G (@jayanthygovindarajan) on

Hubby and I decided to remove the bed as a precaution for the little one who rolls once in a while. However, we enjoy our room and love sleeping on the mattress on the floor. We love the cozy feel and feel our room is more spacious! Movie time has become more enjoyable. 

My love for poems continue and I am slowly getting the vibes of poetry. I am liking what I am doing!

If I am thankful for one thing this month, it's the fever. I realized many things during the full rest period. Sometimes it is breaks like these that shows what life is like.

On the whole, October is the birthday month of my loved one and one gift I can truly give him back is a thankful smile for giving me a nice family.

You can read my Gratitude post for September here!

Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Haikus for Heart prints #writebravely

I had so many plans to end this pro blogger challenge on a lovely note. That too, with heart prints being the final prompt. However, sometimes we plan something and God plans another. Cold and fever had left me drained. So I am finishing my challenge on a simple note now.

I am thankful, grateful and feeling blessed for all your support guys!  Haikus for you.

Your Love and support 
Made challenge interesting
Making heart prints felt

Heart prints of kindness
Sent during our high fever,
I Will not forget

At tough times like these
A supportive family
Is what we all need.

Feeling so blessed
To have family and friends
To boost energy.

My dearest husband
Your love, patience and support 
Helped us heal quickly.

#writebravely #writetribeproblogger

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